3/10/10 Dearborn: The Movie on The Counter Project

Politics: This topic has typically made for pretty good cinema. “Syriana,” “Good Night and Good Luck,” “Dave,” “Bobby,” “Frost/Nixon,” “Primary Colors,” “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington”… Hollywood has been dramatizing national and international poltics for decades. But rarely does the local political scene—city hall, a school board, student government—make it on to the big screen.

That’s not to say local politics is boring. On the contrary, politics right here in Dearborn can get quite interesting. From last century’s controversial and charismatic mayor Orville Hubbard to the controversial and antagonistic city councilman Doug Thomas; with family names on the line (O’Reilly, Guido, Hubbard); and with big-time deals being penned in a smallish-town environment, you’re bound to get neighbors talking to neighbors about what’s going down (or not going down) inside city hall. And you’re bound to have some interesting story lines, characters and settings.

Dearborn’s political scene really does have it all: diverse culture, religion, big business, small business, industry…money, power, legacy…a storied past, a struggling present, an uncertain future…I can’t be the only one who thinks it’s time Hollywood turned Dearborn’s political scene into a feature film! The city wants residents to suggest interesting places around town to be used as a movie backdrop? Well, how about City Hall!

I’ll let the professionals come up with a workable script, but I did take it upon myself to cast the movie—and dammit, you won’t be disappointed in the all-star cast I’ve assembled. Check it out:

First, how can you have a movie about Dearborn politics without Orville Hubbard? Jon Voight will star as the old-timey segregationist.

Next up, the late great Mayor Michael Guido will be played by none other than "The Sopranos" own Joseph Ganniscoli.

It’s going to take a little “Just For Men” beard dye, but I think Rob Reiner will make a dashing Mayor John B. O’Reilly Jr.

Then, keeping it all in the family, we’ll have Rob’s dad Carl Reiner step into the role of Mayor John B. O’Reilly Sr.

Current Council President Thomas Tafelski will be played by Detroit’s own Dave Coulier.

Councilman George Darany will be portrayed by Andy Garcia. I couldn’t find any pics of Garcia with glasses and a moustache, so I had to do a little photo doctoring to get it just right.

SNL alum Jimmy Fallon (r) will step into the giant shoes of Councilman Brian O’Donnell (l).

Councilman Robert Abraham will be played by Jeremy Piven.

Nancy Hubbard will be played admirably by Joan Rivers.

Former Councilman Doug Thomas will be played comically by Leslie Nielsen.

The School board will be in the movie too, of course. Dearborn Schools Superintendent Brian Whiston will be played by Stephen Root…

…and Board Trustee Aimee Blackburn will be played by Erin Grey.

And of course, the business community:

Steve Zahn (r) will take on the role of local businessman and developer Hakim Fakhoury (l).

And Jerry Mathers (r) as Bill Ford Jr (l).

Feel free to fill in the gaps (I know I didn’t cast all of the major players). I'm not quite sure how things in Hollywood work, but I'm hoping we can start shooting by summer. And if all goes according to plan, we could have a Christmas blockbuster on our hands.

Now how do I get in touch with Ollie Stone...

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Member Opinions:

By: cornerstore on 3/11/10
Very amusing article. You certainly nailed it Joan Rivers portraying Nancy Hubbard!

By: SpecialK on 3/11/10
You can't have a movie about Dearborn without dipshit Joe Agius being portrayed & who better but the lead singer of Creed? Not sure if he can act but they are like twins & come on, how hard is it to play a complete & total douche bag? Granted he's not a political figure but I hate political movies so without a little drama & drugs I wouldn't watch it & Joe is a great subject for that.

By: Fargus on 3/11/10
Damn, good call with Joseph Ganniscoli! I think the lazy man's choice would've been James Gandolfini, but Ganniscoli is a much better resemblance to Guido.

By: Bababooey on 3/11/10
Hilarious!!!!

I like how Voight and Hubbard both have the same expression and are both wearing bowties. And Steve Zahn and Hakim both have tan jackets and open collars. Good work getting pics that resemble the original.

By: Apple78 on 3/11/10
Awesome! Love the moustache on Andy Garcia.

By: Greely on 3/12/10
Meathead as Jack O'Reilly! Brilliant!

By: Bababooey on 3/14/10
"Meathead!" lol! They should work that reference into the script somehow!

By: PnkGrly on 3/15/10
OMG Robert Abraham and Jeremy Piven. Love it!

By: triscuit on 3/20/10
I'm amazed at how much Jimmy Fallon looks like Brian O'Donnell. I didn't see it immediately, but...the resemblance creeped up on me. Now I'll always see Jimmy whenever I watch council meeting.

By: Benji on 3/21/10
Love it!

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